The Rusty Trumpet was founded in 2026 by Bo and Kelsey Milner, two Americans who moved to Canada in 2024 and have had absolutely nothing to do since.

Bo spent eleven years in Los Angeles working in television development, which is the industry term for attending meetings about shows that never get made. Kelly was a litigation attorney who specialized in making large corporations feel briefly uncomfortable before they settled. Together they owned a house in Silver Lake, partied with the stars, loved to snack at Trader Joe's, and described themselves as "doing great" at dinner parties until one morning (November 6th, 2024) as they sadly slurped at their giant mugs of Starbucks coffee, they spoke a silent knowing look, and began packing.

They relocated to Victoria, British Columbia, a city that is aggressively beautiful, unbelievably peaceful, has universal healthcare and is just 28 Miles North of the flaming dumpster fire that is they're beloved USA. They bought a bigger house. They got a dog named Gerald. They started going to bed at 9:30. For approximately eighteen months, they watched American burn from a safe distance the way we all watched the towers come down on 9/11 — with horror, with fascination, and with the low-grade guilt of someone who got out alive.

Then Bo started ranting and raving like a lunatic. Kelly told him his rageing rambles were highly amusing. Bo said she was legally obligated to say that. She said she was no longer practicing law and could say whatever she wanted. He published the first issue of The Rusty Trumpet on Friday the 15th, 2026 to an audience of sixty-nine people, thirty-seven of whom were personal contacts and 32 of whom had clearly clicked a wrong link..

The name comes from two things: the sound American democracy makes when it tries to play a triumphant note these days, but mostly it's a far too kind nickname for the pathological pedophile President of the United States of America that we will not name here now.

The Rusty Trumpet does not pretend it is anything other than what it is... it's a righteously far left, agressively progressive, pro-democracy news site with a political diagnosis that is damn near temrinal. Either fight like hell for truth, dignity, and justice now or forever burn in a fascist, authoritarian, kleptocratic waste land. There is no other option, it's truth to power and fight like hell.

Bo writes. Kelly edits, which means she removes the parts where Bo gets too pleased with himself, which is most of the time. Gerald attends all editorial meetings and has yet to object to anything, which the Milners have chosen to interpret as glowing approval.

They still miss Los Angeles the way you miss a relationship that was genuinely wonderful right up until it wasn't. They do not miss the 405. They do not miss pilot season. They do not miss paying forty-two dollars for parking at a farmers market to buy tomatoes from a man named Brayden, and they sure as hell do not miss having to worry about getting shot in the face by an ICE Agent for blowing on a whistle.

Victoria is clean and beautiful. The healthcare is real and fast. Gerald is happy and wet (it rains.. a lot).

America, please remember.. it's always darkest before the dawn, and Don's got like three more months among the living... tops. So hang in there, the midterms are coming fast.

The Rusty Trumpet publishes daily, and it's free, because you've suffered enough.